Next to Normal

I have been listening to the soundtrack for the Broadway musical Next to Normal… pretty much all day every day for the last few days. It is very beautiful, although very much Rent-esque. What does that mean? Well if you are offended by the language in the soundtrack to Rent, you might want to not listen to this one. It also is very much a rock opera like Rent is. The music ranges from rock to beautiful ballads, almost a lullaby.

The story of Next to Normal is about mental health issues that a family deals with because of some mental health issues of the mom, Diana. While to story is a deep one, and the characters are rich, the lyrics to this musical are some of the most beautiful I have heard in a long time. My favorite line is “Valium is my favorite color, how did you know?”

The kids in the show, Natalie and Gabe, kind of fight for the attention of Diana. Natalie feels neglected by her mom because she focuses so much on Gabriel. At the same time the husband, Dan, tries to help Diana through her treatment and suggests radical treatment to “get them back to better than before.” The only other characters in the show are Diana’s therapist and Natalie’s boyfriend.

After electroshock treatment Diana loses 19 years of memory which includes the wedding and births of her children. Dan tries to rebuild her memory without letting her hear about the bad bits of their history. Slowly she starts to get her memory back, even the bad things. However, the biggest memory dealing with her mental issues is just out of reach and she cannot remember all of the pieces.

There are aspects of this story that are very touching. For example when Natalie sings the song about Superboy (Gabe) and the Invisible Girl (herself) Diana tells Natalie that she loves her; she tell Natalie that she loves her as much as she can.

This line hit me today as I was listening to it “I love you as much as I can.” We all show love in different levels and different degrees. There will be some people in our lives who are able to openly and freely give us all of their heart and show immense love to us. Others can only show a little, or are not able to express love in ways we may consider socially acceptable. It is interesting to me to see the different levels of love that we show through our lives. For example a little child learns early to love everyone. They have to learn stranger danger.

As teenagers I think we become scared of showing love, or of showing public love to our family. We are exploring new kinds of love with the opposite sex… or not. Then as young adults we once again start expressing love more openly to our families and friends. I hear there is no love to compare to the love of a new parent (although as an aunt I think I can come close to imagining it.) Once again we show unconditional love to another, it becomes all about another person.

Another aspect of this show is how our lives do not need to be perfect and try as we might we often fall short of that perfect dream. But as long as we try and do the best we can we can be normal, or sometimes we get close… we get next to normal. We get close to good. I think when we stop trying to be perfect and just try our best life becomes a little easier and a lot less stressful! When we can find our own version of normal, we have succeeded in this life and then it becomes our task to help others find their normal.

“Let go of what’s past, and maybe I’ll see you at last. We tried to give you a normal life. I realize now I have no clue what that means. I don’t need a life that is normal. That’s way too far away. But something next to normal would be okay. Yes, something next to normal, that is the thing I would like to try. Close enough to normal, to get by. We’ll get by.” Next to Normal

At the end of this musical, after all of the crazy and darkness of their trials, they sing a song about finding light.

“We need some light; first of all we need some light. You can’t sit here in the dark all alone, it is a sorry sight. It is just you and me. We’ll live you’ll see!”

Find some way to survive this life and be happy to live next to normal!